deck the halls with boughs of holly

I went Christmas caroling with the Two Harbors Girl Scouts today at Sunrise Nursing Home and Sunrise on Superior. The Nursing home makes me sad, the residents with severe health problems, the ones who don't know where they are and yell for mom or dad, and then there is the fact that I know some are rarely or even never visited. I don't know if the girls realize how much the residents like them coming and just saying hello. There was one resident who sang out loud and clear with us, and then sang in between our songs. Mom told me she sings all the time. She just seemed so happy to be alive and singing, it was great.

After caroling we went out with my grandma and then decorated her apartment. I love her Christmas decorations. One of my favorites that she has is the little old clear plastic tree with small shiny red Christmas balls that hang from the cracked plastic branches. I guess it's been around since my Oldest Aunt and Uncle were little. (late 40s early 50s) Mom said it was always her favorite, cause she got to decorate it every year when she was little. It was a big explosion of Christmas all over, cause I insisted on finding a place for every ornament that I could. We listened to Christmas music on the radio and laughed about the decor I put together, like the white porcelain carolers (with lamp post) on the red viking ship. It was a good day and evening all together. I am ready to really dig out our Christmas decorations and have Christmas all over here too!

Tomorrow is Black Friday and from 4:45 to 1:45 I will be working at Old Navy.

Today was filled with Family, Turkey and Pie. It was the usual family get together at my aunts house. My 3 almost 4 year old cousin Austin was there. He farted on my leg several times and when I told him he better watch it cause I'll have that guy in the corner over there (my dad) fart on him, and he doesn't want that, he said "Great Grandma will toot on YOU!" He has become good entertainment, but with that a farting, burping, violent boy. His new favorite game is guns.


There is snow on the ground and big flakes falling in the sky. I am excited for the holiday season!













: )

happy election day!

I just voted, and I feel you should too.

i got this feelin' that i've been here before

Sorry little blog for my lack of updates.
Well Alicia Keys didn't happen in the end, instead we went to Chris Pureka.

















Summer came and went.
Camp was nowhere near the same.
Things were just strange.

Life now...

• Working at Old Navy.
• I have a date set for the GED, but I am telling no one until after the fact.
• Roundelay is my new kitty companion and I love her to little bits. (she's on the screen window right now)
• Viola is my new rodent companion, she's real cute with a million little cowlicks!
  

of cabbages and kings

I am officially no longer a student at MNOHS. I am studying for the GED and will be starting to take the test in two weeks at the latest. It comes in several chunks, and takes 7 hours total.


I have a new fascination with worm farming. A women who had her own worm farm came to a GS event and it was really interesting. I'm making my own in a rubbermaid container. It involves a spigot, my new favorite word.


Rachel called me with an opportunity to go in a limo to go see Alicia Keys in the cities on Wednesday. Of course I said yes, yes, yes!
Uh oh whoa oh oh,
uh oh whoa oh oh,
uh oh whoa oh oh, OH, OH, OH, OH, OH!!!!!

moving right along

I've decided to go get my GED. I feel like it would be a waste of time to do another year online, when I could start at LSC and do generals this coming school year. I've e-mailed schools I would want to transfer to, asking if a GED would affect my chances of transferring there. The answer: Nope! After doing so many credits at LSC they wouldn't even care about my previous schooling. I think I might take Italian.
: )
I'm glad to see the end.

Actual post date-
Sunday, April 6, 2008

now listen up...(my fat rant)

My grandmother said if I finally lost some weight I could be so pretty. Could be? I haven't recently thought of myself as unattractive. I mean sure I'm fat, but why does that have to be unattractive? And why does fat have to be such a bad word? FAT, FAT, FAT!

My life has always had these side notes from family, kids at school, friends, even random strangers about how I am too big, or how someone else is too big, gross, or ugly. Do you know that person? How smart they are? How kind? Creative? Fun?

This blurb about Kiera Knightley talking about Beth Ditto from The Gossip is amazing.

Someone once said to me "Fat people don't have sex!". I told him fat people have sex, loud, kinky, dirty sex. Where do people get the idea fat people don't have sex? Yes, once you weigh over 190 you can no longer fuck. Just because I weigh 265 pounds doesn't mean my libido shuts off, or I can't have an orgasm.

For several years I have decided against buying anything in stores who don't carry even a shirt that would fit me. This cuts shopping options down quite a bit. I also prefer to not shop in stores with a "plus sized" section. These sections, most times, contain shapeless tubes of material they try to call dresses and several colors of t-shirts. So I am allowed to wear a mumu, jeans, and solid color t-shirts. I don't think so. Wake-up fashion industry! Just because you are not comfortable with my body doesn't mean that I am not and that I don't want to look good. I want to walk into a womens clothing section and find an xxl in every style. I want stores that I can buy more than accessories in. I want to buy a size 22 jean from Old Navy, Lane Bryant, or Torrid. I would like to support local independent sellers, but you indie sellers are in the same small boat as most chains, many times you are lucky to find an xl, let alone a double, or triple x. I've also decided that if stores wont provide me with what I want I will have to make it myself. I have picked up my first simple dress pattern and some navy material. If it goes semi well and I like it, I will start making my own clothes that would fit both my size and my politics.

Of course I'm not saying people should laze around on the couch in front of the TV eating cheese puffs and drinking cola all day because being fat is okay. Not one bit. I'm a believer in eating healthy and exercising. I've made the decision to eat healthy and exercise on a regular basis. Not for the purpose of changing my body, but being healthier and happier.

Joy Nash's video "A Fat Rant" is wonderful. She hits everything on the ball, some of the things I said and more.


Actual post date-
Saturday, February 23, 2008

of shoes and ships and sealing wax

New space. Live journal seems sort of messy, old. Maybe it has baggage I need to leave behind. Others have moved on to bigger, bolder, bloggier things and maybe my time has come. A new found space of reflection, memories, rhymes, and simplicity. Of course I still have my tried and true composition notebook, with life as I see it no holding back, and snip-its and tidbits of things found.

Thinking of times spent years ago in the park in segog. The little path from grandma's right to the park, with random bits of peoples lives in the woods. Rusty bed springs, and old back pack, shoes worn beyond the wearable. All pieces of treasure in my 6 year-old eyes. It's strange how much our imagination changes. Things go from being interesting and explorable, to pieces of trash someone dropped in the woods. A 1/2 block walk through the woods I took so so many times. I don't remember anything but the woods and a slide. A huge slide. The ladder seemed to take forever to climb, I wonder if it really is as big as I think. I found this comic that fit it just ever so perfectly. It just fits the place my mind has been lately. Wondering if all of the things from when I was young are still as amazing and beautiful. Part of me wants to revisit places, but I am worried things will not be the same in 19 year old eyes I have now. Though working with kids at Nettleton has opened up more doors of imagination, and being able to see the joy in so many things. Seeing the things I have lost or misplaced over the years is changing the way I look at everything. Why can't things be amazing time and time again?



Actual post date-
Monday, February 18, 2008